‘It’s like they just rolled out of bed’: Employers boost business etiquette training
Ideas around what constitutes socially acceptable behavior at work have shifted widely following the pandemic and in new hybrid arrangements.
Despite some changing norms, particularly those driven by Gen Z, knowing how to conduct oneself professionally and interact with others respectfully will always be important in workplaces, said Pamela Eyring, president and owner of the Protocol School of Washington.
Major government agencies, corporations like Boeing and Mastercard and academic institutions have sent staff to the Protocol School to get training on business etiquette, communication skills, building relationships and ultimately properly conducting themselves in professional situations.
About half of employers said they were offering business etiquette training last year amid the return to offices, and about 20% said they planned to offer it this year, according to a survey from Resume Builder including over 1,500 respondents.
Eyring has a unique perspective on the state of etiquette and professionalism in the workplace today, following a nearly 40-year career and experience as the first civilian chief of protocol at Wright-Patterson Air Force Base. In that role she planned and directed military ceremonies, conferences, events and even presidential visits. She spoke with WorkLife about the state of workplace etiquette, what will change with Gen Z, and what will always stay the same.
This interview has been edited for clarity.
How much has business etiquette as an expected baseline standard declined in recent years?
Significantly, because we’re getting more inbound requirements from companies and organizations, and in class when we’re working with these adults we’re learning more of their challenge areas. What’s happening is since the pandemic there’s a lot of pressure to transition from remote to hybrid. And when people were working fully remote we went to a really casual state, unfortunately too casual. If you’re online and you have a meeting, internally or externally, you should dress and be groomed like you would if you were physically in the office. Some of the feedback I’ve gotten from organizations is, ‘it’s like they just rolled out of bed and they don’t even look presentable.’ And this is where you’re branding your career, by showing up in a way that’s branding yourself, but it also brands your organization. You’re a direct reflection of your organization, so you want consistency with that.
What do HR leaders and managers need to know about working with younger staff who may be confused about proper etiquette in the workplace?
First of all, let’s just be real — we all have been in this state where we didn’t know what we didn’t know. And we need to teach them. I think new employees, at any age group, should have this soft skills training or business etiquette and professionalism training as part of an onboarding package. Tell them upfront what the expectations are, whether it’s to dress appropriately for meetings, or if you’re having difficulty with a person, don’t get in a screaming contest via email or text, pick up the phone and say, ‘I’m hurting here, I feel that you’ve offended me in some way, and let me tell you why.’ And then have listening skills. Those have got lost, and we have to teach them how to communicate better, because they’re used to just being on a phone, communicating by text – not all, but many.
And I think we have to model professionalism. Leadership, managers, supervisors, team leads, we have to model the professionalism that’s in our organization’s culture, set that etiquette standard and then measure it. We can measure it by checking in with the other colleagues and asking ‘Is she showing up? Is she enjoying her work? Do you find her professional to work with? You know, accountability. If you say that you’re going to be there, be there.
How does your military experience influence your approach to business etiquette?
I worked for the Air Force as a civilian, and I was looking around, observing, and learned how to model good behavior from others. If you see something you want, like, wow, that person is really trusted and respected. Is it their behavior? Is it the way they react to pressure? Is it that they meet deadlines and are actually there for you when you need them? And you know, how do they look? How do they behave with other people? Are they professional? So just observing good behavior and then adopting it for your own needs so it’s authentic.”
That’s what I would love to tell leaders, that they are being watched at all times, and so when they show up I would suggest showing up consistently and to be as professional as they can be, because everyone’s learning from them too. How they react, what they say, how they respond, accountability. And just treat people like you want to be treated. I remember a general walking by and seeing a tissue on the ground. He never would walk by that, he would stop and pick it up and put it in the trash. Those little things, it was a behavior I learned from him, thinking you have to care for and respect your and others’ environments, your workplace, you know, keeping your desk neat, those little things really changed my life.
Gen Z workers care a lot about being authentic at work, and will go against norms that don’t align with their values or that they feel aren’t justified. So where is the balance?
They can still be authentic, but they have to assimilate into that corporation or organization to some extent. We have to adapt our communication styles, we have to adapt how we show up. And I think if they should consider who they work for, what’s the brand of that company or organization, what is the culture of that company, and do I fit into that? Do I enjoy being in a more formal environment, like the government, or do I prefer being somewhere else? And what does that look like? As far as professionalism goes, do I fit in that culture?
They’re coming out of the educational space and they’re going into a new culture, and they have to adapt. Maybe not assimilate 100%, but I call it switching. When I go over to the UAE, I have to switch and adapt my communication style, my patience, my timing. And with careers, I believe they have to adapt to that culture and be open to do that, and they can still be themselves.